Monthly Archives: December 2013

A Method for Changing Your Life

Let me introduce a new method for restructuring yourself to whatever you want to be. It is flexible and simple. You can start immediately and you can use the method in many different way, depending on what you want to accomplish.

Do this:

Open a document on a computer. You may use pen and paper if you want, but since you will restructure your document continually, it will get messy.
Whenever you come upon something, which may richen your life in some kind of way, write down the essence, the sentence or paragraph you have read or heard.
Read your document as often as possible.
If you want to erase something in the document, do so.
If you want to change something in the document, do so.
Thats it.

The meaning of this method is to influence yourself towards whatever change you want to impose on yourself. If you have read some books in your life, you might have noticed that these books actually have changed the way you perceive and interact with the rest of the world.

You might also have noticed that you forget things. Sometimes your read about something that gives the spot-on explanation to how you should make your life better. Then, while you are reading other books, you forget this thing. Until you read that book again, or maybe another book which covers the same principle.

This very method helps you to repeat to yourself whatever insights you find necessary for living life the best way you possibly can.

Whatever you put into the method, and repeat to yourself is up to you and what you read. But with this method you have a tool to influence yourself toward whatever you want to be. What you repeat, will influence you. Therefore it is up to you to choose who you want to be.

Test this method, and find out what it can do for you. It may well change your life.

The Best Decision of Your Life

So, you want to be a writer?

So, you want to have written, but you don’t want to write?

So, you are thinking of how to respond delicatly in your favourite tv show, but you haven’t written your first book yet?

So, you want to write so badly, that you cannot think of anything else, but you don’t know what to write about?

So, you want to earn loads of money by writing?

So, you want to earn your living by writing?

So, you want to keep your social life, while writing?

So, you are thinking more about writing than you are actually writing?

So, you want to write a novel?

So, you are reading this instead of writing?

So, you are watching youtube videos instead of writing?

Give up.

I have done it, time after time. And it is always fantastically relieving.

I’d do it again if I could.

Give up. I promise you. It would be the best decision of your life.

Inspiration is Outside Ourselves

Have you ever wondered about inspiration to write? I have had my thoughts on the subject, since I’ve had writer’s block for about twenty years. And I have found out that there is a huge misconception regarding the subject.

There are two main opposing views regarding inspiration.

There are inspirationalists, which have the belief that you must be inspired to write. They are either waiting for their inspiration to come or using different methods to muster their inspiration, before thay start writing.

Then, there are rationalists. Their favourite quote is that writing is 5% inspiration and 95% transpiration. Simply put, they believe that you write first, and that the inspiration will fall on you during writing.

There is a chasm between these two groups which never will be filled. The inspirationalists call imperiously that they must have inspiration to write. The rationalists snicker to themselves and replies that no real author can wait for inspiration, and need to get the job done day after day.

It is easy to fall to inspirationalism when you get stuck. But waiting for inspiration is a bad idea. The rationalists seem to be right, since you need to put in a lot of hour to complete any longer text. Waiting has never written any text.

Though, the rationalists are not right. They are simply people who are lucky or ignorant enough to be blessed from writer’s block.

The thing that both inspirationalists and rationalists miss, is the fact that writing is reactive.

No text exists in pure vacuum. No thought comes from nowhere. Writing, as well as talking, is a communicative process, which derives from outer sources.

The huge misconception of our time is that inspiration comes from nowhere. It’s the genial mind which creates genial texts. This is total crap.

Texts are always a reaction to something essential in real life. If a text is not anchored to real life in any kind of way, not even a metaphorical way, then the text is crap.

The stronger the bond is between real life and any text, the stronger the text is. And I mean this in a das ding an mich kind of way. When the world view in a text is fathomable and acceptable to me as a reader, then I can grasp, understand and even appreciate the text.

When we take this piece of information, and combine it with inspiration and the lack of it, a new picture emerges.

Inspiration is reaction.

We get inspired by things outside of ourselves. Anything might trigger our imagination or cognitive process. If this thing is strong enough, we can write for as long as we want to write. We can rewrite over and over again, until a text is done.

If we don’t have anything to react to, we are completely empty. Try to write in a completely empty state of mind, and you will see your efforts turn to crap. Literally. You will write profound shit.

I know, because I have written profound shit for twenty years. Almost everything have been crap. And the reason for this, is that I have had the misconception of the artist as the Great Creator. And sadly enough, I have been wrong.

So, writer’s block exists, to the contrary to what the most stubborn rationalists tell you. But you can never outwait writer’s block. On the other hand, you may well find inspiration anywhere. In the real world that is. As you perceive it.

You can find inspiration anywhere outside yourself. You must find inspiration somewhere outside yourself. If you search for inspiration inside yourself, the only center you might arrive to will be your navel.

Therefore, get your inspiration from the real world. Get your inspiration from your view of the real world. Then, tell us.

Welcome to torbjornperttu.com

Today I have opened up the gates for my new site. This is torbjornperttu.com.

On this site I will publish texts of general interest for a worldwide public. As on torbjornperttu.se there will be a wide variety of topics. The core will be that the texts are products of my mind and my thoughts.

Happy reading!

Free Yourself From Abuse

The Swedish blog imperhia has published the article Skapandet av knullgubbar where the author speculates how male abusers are raised. The author’s main argument is that adult violence stems from the acceptance of boys’ violence as children. The solution is to not accept boys’ violent behaviour.

The author’s line of reasoning starts with a personal anecdote, where her daughter has been kicked by a boy in school. This was not a single event, but rather one in a series of events of physical harassment. So the author asks her child whether her teacher had done anything about these occurrences, and her child answers that her teacher has opposed the assaults verbally, but the boy has not ceased the abuse.

The author then confronts her daughter’s teacher regarding the situation and the teacher’s answer is that the author’s daughter is popular among the boys, and that she needs to say no more clearly.

It is att this point the author gets angry. Her daughter should not learn to say no clearly, and makes parallels to rape cases where the victim hasn’t said no clearly enough. Her daughter should not have to learn to say no, it is the boy who should cease his dysfunctional behaviour.

The solution is that we should talk to the violent boys. We should not accept their behaviour. We should hug them instead and make them understand that it is ok for boys to cry as well. We should love the aggression away.

Let’s just wait a minute here. I think everyone can agree not to tolerate violence between kids nor adults. Yet, it exists as the author has made clear to us.

I am sure that the teacher has done everything the author asks for: disapproved of violent behaviour, talked to the violator and most probably hugged him at some time or other. Clearly it hasn’t helped.

We can understand the author’s motives and concur with them as well. But when it comes to the acute moment of abuse, neither love nor any meek behaviour will diminish the abuser’s violence. Actually, that kind of behaviour is the ultimate self sacrificing act.

I believe, regardless of the article’s author’s consternation, that the teacher was right. In any situation of violent abuse, there are mainly three strategies that work.

Immediately, as a victim of an assault you must show non-acceptance, by telling or shouting your opposition, or by hitting back.

Secondly, you should make others aware of the abuse. In an acute situation, you may shout for help to bypassers. When it comes to abuse within a relationship, tell everyone you know: your friends, your family, the police, the abuser’s family and friends. Tell strangers, tell anyone who might be able to help you.

Thirdly, get away from the abuser as soon as possible. Ask for help from your peers, friends and family. Though, it might seem not in the situation, everyone is eager to help a victim of abuse.

Now, the attentive might see that the abused daughter of the story has gone through all of these phases, perhaps without saying no strongly enough. Though, she has told her teacher and her parents. It is possible to relegate the boy in question and force him to change classes or school.

If all of these steps has been taken without sufficient effect, there is a fourth step. But before I present the fourth step, I’d like to retrace the situation a bit.

Most of us raise our children to respect others, physically as well as psychologically. But not all children are raised in that way. Some children are themselves victims of abuse, and we know that these children become abusers themselves.

Surely, we can try to teach abused children respect. We can try to hug them and love them and so on. But in some cases, this will not help. Some children will grow up into adult individuals who turn out to be aggressive and beat other people.

Abusers and psychopaths of different kinds see others as prays or predators. They will only listen to the rule of power, and power only. You can only force these people, by showing them that you have more power than them.

The fourth action for a victim of abuse is to show his assailant a power demonstration. The victim needs to bite back and do it hard. Or as Johnny Depp’s mother told him during his childhood. I wish that someone had told me that before I went to school. And I will surely tell my children the very same thing.

If your are a victim of domestic violence and need more help, there is a great TED talk by Leslie Morgan Steiner I strongly recommend.

The music method to higher efficiency

To anyone who wants to be more efficient.

I have recently discovered a method to raise my personal efficiency, while at the same time allow myself to be lazier.

The method is quite simple. I lay down on my bed an listen to the next tune in my overall playlist. While the song is playing, I ponder what I should do as soon as the song is done. I keep the best choice in my mind, while thinking of other possibilities. When the tune has faded out, I do the best choice.

The method works extremely well because of two main reasons.

First of all, you get a natural time constraint in choosing what to do. You might not choose the best action all the time, but surely you will choose a good enough action at every possible moment, without much of a delay.

The other reason why this method is fantastic, is that rest is naturally built into the process. Music becomes a perfect cue for mental and physical relaxation. Instead of getting exhausted by choosing what to do, the process itself become invigorating.

Therefore, for those who find it straining to choose what to do, this method will be revolutionary. Choosing and resting and the same time will unlock efficiency beyond any know barrier for them.

Do you sometimes find yourself paralyzed because you have too much to do? Do you indulge for hours playing video games, knowing you really ought to do other more important things? Is your daily todolists filled with hundreds or thousands of posts? Then this method is for you. Log in to spotify or your favorite radio station, listen to a song and do what is best for you at that very moment.

Three major changes

To readers of this blog.

I have recently made three major changes to this blog.

Firstly, I have removed the gift page. The reason is simply that no one was interested in free things. Not a single soul. Thus, it was a waste of time. Which is kind of sad, because I like the idea of hosting a giveaway blog. But I guess thrift shops are better markets for non-personal giving.

Secondly, I have disabled comments. The spam has been a true nuisance. An overwhelming majority of the comments on this blog have been spam. It has been a terrible moral-crushing time sink. I’m glad to get rid of them. But that is also kind of sad, since I believe in the power of interaction and discussion, to heighten creativity and build knowledge.

Therefore, I have a suggestion of a new way of handling blog discussions. Whenever someone wants to reply to anything I have written, my recommendation is to post the reply on their own blog, and get a ping back from the article they are referring to. I believe that by creating a network where everyone is responsible for their own statements on their own platforms, together, we will create a fertile soil for discussion and creativity.

Thirdly, I have decided to introduce my articles, by addressing them to whatever audience I believe might be interested in the article. I am not entirely sure this is good SEO.

Still, I believe it is necessary. The reason is that this blog spans a wide array of topics. I don’t think there is one single reader who is interested in everything I write about. Therefore, I need to give some kind of service to my readers. They need to know if the text is meant for them or not.

Also, this thought of addressing audiences stems from an idea I have had about recommendations. I’d like to build a recommendation site which is specialized in recommendations only directed to people. I.e. “this film is for those who like beautiful photo, but not for those who want a lot of shooting” or “this book is perfect for those who want to ponder about a moral dilemma, but not for those who require a well-written book”. Such statements give the readers much better feel for what the narrations are about, than almost any other kind of statement.

I am not completely sure that addressing the audience is a good thing to do. But I need to test it for a while, and try it out before deciding wether to discard it or not.